[UncleWede]

^ No, but there WERE all those road trips Lups went on by herself. . .

[Kev312]

So Lups got a vasectomy? I thought that's what was meant when "Peter" was no more.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

^ No, but there WERE all those road trips Lups went on by herself. . .

Very good point sir. That would have left her long suffering counterpart ample time to go get a snip.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

Allow me to share a little story with you:

One of the guys that my brother works with did this - so this is a true story. He was on the second (I believe) kid with his wife, and his wife really wanted more, but he was done. Anyways, one day he told his wife that he and the guys were doing a guy's trip to Las Vegas for an upcoming weekend and so she knew he was going to be away and all that, everything was good. However, there was no actual Las Vegas trip. Instead, he went to the urologist, got snipped / vasectomy, and booked himself into a hotel for the weekend to recover so that his wife knew nothing and just assumed he was in Vegas.

Now I'm not sure if she has found out yet, I can't remember whether there were updates to the story, but the above part I remember.

So I have to ask...has your husband ever been on any "trips with the guys" for a few days in the past few years??

He did go with his high school classmates to a concert last summer and before that in the last 15 or so years we've been together it has always been me who vanishes and even I was good till my dad died. After that I did do a few more epic trips (no babies) but it's clear that pissing him off is my preferred method of birth control.

Last weekend I was building a kitchen. Some floors. A wall, you know, easy shit. This is what he's been stuck with now for two months. Digging up, hauling out, redoing surfaces, figuring out parts. You name it, he's done it. He didn't get a say on the house and he sure as fuck missed the exparation date on the wife but he still did this this weekend alone for me and for my insane project house.





That's two layers of concrete, with plastics that has to be preserved, the thingies have to flow the right way and basically one mistake means the difference of the house is the shit, or in a shit.

I fucking love this house since I get to be flamboyant and just rip shit to pieces but the outer walls, roofs, electrics and all are good to go. It's easy to ignore the work the other one does.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Kev312

So Lups got a vasectomy? I thought that's what was meant when "Peter" was no more.

My testosterone levels are up still, i just lost my playful cocktail sausage.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

Very good point sir. That would have left her long suffering counterpart ample time to go get a snip.

Ah, he was stuck with the kids and the dogs. No time then, though he is used to constant pain since he can live with me.

[Lups]

I'm going to fetch a beer or two, but I sure have a story to type up later.

[UncleWede]

I actually had real coffee today, so ready for tale

[Lups]

This will be the last project of this scale I'll ever do for myself. This post should tell you why.

Okay, so I'm not a fashion icon here, I can accept that. I mean I have zero interest in any of that, but I do love building shit. Renovating especially is my speciality. I absolutely love taking something old and outdated and transforming it to something different. Over the years I've gathered a great crew around me. My electrician for example can't be recommended more highly. He is a world class man, who has during the 13 years we've worked together understood that I think electricity should jump from a point to an other, and he just has to make it appear like it does to make me happy.

No, for real, the man is nearing seventy and he retired 4 years ago but since he still has a company and a license, he wanted to come in and do the job since apparently working with me is challenging and fun. Last week he rewired a fuse box that's 70 or so years old so I could keep it, this week he was drilling through concrete to make my kitchen happen. He is more than used to my elegance.

So... let's jump back a bit.

In August I broke some ribs with this fucking cold. After that I've had a few good days here and there but mostly I work at a snail's pace since the ribs never got to heal right since the kids keep on bringing new colds in. I also managed to get most of my upper body to a cramping stage since that's what all the cool kids do these days to get muscle relaxants. My doctor says I'm not stupid, just insane but the on the not medical attention needing ways (He is also a relative so I guess in my 36 years on earth he has had the time to form a diagnosis. I'm safe I think
). Anyway, last week the family started to go through a new wave of a cold and of course I caught it too.

Yes. I am using a cold as my excuse for what I'm about to show you.

You see... I'm an easy going person. I just assume people I meet often know they can have a laugh at my expense every time since this world is pretty joyless for too many folks. My ego can take it. Hell, I'm showing you this so you can laugh too.

So the bar that serves the closest hot meal has a bar keeper who has an opinion on my appearance. A straw to a beer is a statement.



I took the time to go for a smoke to review my appearance and I thought you all deserve to know. After working since six am, around eight pm I go out, like near other people I mean, still looking like this, well wearing this. Fine, my left ankle is swollen but there is no excuse big enough for this.




Now. My beloved sister said to me that was just the bottom half of a horror story that has to be shown.

(My other friends were more cruel.)

That was the top.



I know I've been sick for ages now and yeah, no rest for the evil bitch but the electrician sent me off to a shop yesterday. He needed a part and he also wanted me to go away. He did me a shopping list I was going to take a photo of but since that shirt selfie was the last one I had taken, I ended up with a photo that basically tells you all why women are absent from construction sites.

I'm sharing this for educational purposes. This is why your wives don't go do the heavy lifting.



After that pic of me taking a pic of the shopping list, the damn electrician rolled around the floor. Apparently, wardrobe is not my thing but he sure does like my self cut short hair.

Anyway. I haven't burned the shirt. The hair is still that bad. I still don't know how to operate a phone and yes, I am so sick my face is bloated. I just think it will benefit me that I show you all what happens to me during a big site since this way maybe I'll find an easier hobby for the future.

[UncleWede]

I didn't think Smell-a-Vision had been created yet. I stand corrected.

Prez Kerr, would you agree with my recommendation of a bag of milk?

[Lups]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

I didn't think Smell-a-Vision had been created yet. I stand corrected.

Prez Kerr, would you agree with my recommendation of a bag of milk?

Fuck you. You're not bringing the milk battle in to this.

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Lups

Fuck you. You're not bringing the milk battle in to this.

I kind of think I just did, so THERE

[Lups]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

I kind of think I just did, so THERE

You do know I was going to name a kitchen after you? No? Well if you weren't this mean, I'd spend the rest of my life in the Mrs Wade kitchen cooking near my one mildly Spanish (ish)feature (which is basically Mexican since that's a tiny leap considering all others we need to overlook here) of any sort.

You'd rather have a Canadian neighbour you agree with or a Finnish kitchen named after how I read your handle and dedicated to your wife?

[Lups]

And that's not blackmailing. The milk war has only one loser, and that's Canada. Not just Joe. All Canadians who allow milk to be tortured.

Anyway I got my two beers in and I honest to god wish I will never have to do this to myself again.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Lups

You do know I was going to name a kitchen after you? No? Well if you weren't this mean, I'd spend the rest of my life in the Mrs Wade kitchen cooking near my one mildly Spanish (ish)feature (which is basically Mexican since that's a tiny leap considering all others we need to overlook here) of any sort.

You'd rather have a Canadian neighbour you agree with or a Finnish kitchen named after how I read your handle and dedicated to your wife?

I'd say UncleWede is playing the long game here - strategic if you will. I mean, to hear everyone go on and on about global warming, he might legitimately be thinking the 'Nard will one day in his lifetime become inhospitable.

And then what? If that were to occur, Canada would likely be still quite nice in terms of temperature, and it is quite close, being landmarked and all which means he can bring all his possessions. Plus we speak a language he already understands.

On the other hand, we have Finland. Nobody in their right mind wants to try to learn how to speak Finnish. It would be a long flight, and he couldn't take his goats with him. And this kitchen...I mean we don't really know whether you cook well or not - perhaps he wants to wait and see and make sure the kitchen is worthy of something close to his name before he truly commits. Maybe conduct interviews of your children and husband first.


So...have a possible Canadian sponsor to allow him to prolong his life and enjoy his possessions, or....have a kitchen not really named after him, just named after him in...spirit. I'd say he's made the right choice.

[UncleWede]

^Yeah, what he said, eh.

Plus I have a niece in Montreal

If the kitchen isn't red, it certainly isn't hawt enough to be named after me or my wife. I saw no flowing silk curtains to simulate my hair either.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I'd say UncleWede is playing the long game here - strategic if you will. I mean, to hear everyone go on and on about global warming, he might legitimately be thinking the 'Nard will one day in his lifetime become inhospitable.

And then what? If that were to occur, Canada would likely be still quite nice in terms of temperature, and it is quite close, being landmarked and all which means he can bring all his possessions. Plus we speak a language he already understands.

On the other hand, we have Finland. Nobody in their right mind wants to try to learn how to speak Finnish. It would be a long flight, and he couldn't take his goats with him. And this kitchen...I mean we don't really know whether you cook well or not - perhaps he wants to wait and see and make sure the kitchen is worthy of something close to his name before he truly commits. Maybe conduct interviews of your children and husband first.


So...have a possible Canadian sponsor to allow him to prolong his life and enjoy his possessions, or....have a kitchen not really named after him, just named after him in...spirit. I'd say he's made the right choice.

I cook better than I dress. That one I can guarantee.

Fair point my dear. If I wasn't on a dead dead die deadline, I'd love to chat about this more.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Lups

I cook better than I dress. That one I can guarantee.

Despite having never tasted your cooking, having seen the attire posted previously, I can confidently give you this one as well.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

Despite having never tasted your cooking, having seen the attire posted previously, I can confidently give you this one as well.

Hey watch it! Those are my indestructible fishing pants from late 90's, crocs I stole from my mother who's dog has eaten half of them but my ankle is being a bitch so putting on real shoes isn't an option but the shirt has always looked as horrible as it does today. I don't know where it came from but I sure hope I was drunk if I bought it.

[Captain Blood]

Originally Posted by Lups

Yes. I am using a cold as my excuse for what I'm about to show you.

You see... I'm an easy going person. I just assume people I meet often know they can have a laugh at my expense every time since this world is pretty joyless for too many folks. My ego can take it. Hell, I'm showing you this so you can laugh too.

So the bar that serves the closest hot meal has a bar keeper who has an opinion on my appearance. A straw to a beer is a statement.

That's all the beer you got? 2 little glasses? What are you , Canadian?

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Real Dodger

That's all the beer you got? 2 little glasses? What are you , Canadian?

If I didn't stop by to eat every now and then, or rather daily while doing this project, I would doubt no bar worker would serve a person as stylish as I. There are real perks in being a known style icon, one of them is that people give me alcohol when a certain threshold in appearance has been reached.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Real Dodger

That's all the beer you got? 2 little glasses? What are you , Canadian?

Watch it mister! You are cruising for a bruising!