Chuck Norris Facts

Bimmer-Pilot · 11-06-2009, 09:36 AM

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Bulldog 6 · 11-07-2009, 01:45 AM

Chuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity, Chuck Norris got it back.

Tondtar · 11-08-2009, 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bulldog 6

Chuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity, Chuck Norris got it back.

Good one

2AD Tanker · 11-20-2009, 01:08 PM

I have not laughed this hard in a while!!!!!

UltimateBMW · 11-20-2009, 03:18 PM

Chuck Norris vs. The Bear Jew

Who'd win?

Memphis1 · 11-20-2009, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UltimateBMW

Chuck Norris vs. The Bear Jew

Who'd win?

chuck norris

lostkhan · 11-22-2009, 03:15 AM

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.

Chuck Norris doesn't get pulled over.

Chuck Norris is suing NBC for their show Law & Order claiming it is the trademarked names of his left and right legs.

When girls have sex with god, they scream CHUCK NORRIS!!

boymonkey · 11-22-2009, 04:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostkhan

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.

Chuck Norris doesn't get pulled over.

Chuck Norris is suing NBC for their show Law & Order claiming it is the trademarked names of his left and right legs.

When girls have sex with god, they scream CHUCK NORRIS!!

LOL

SteveMD · 11-30-2009, 04:22 PM

Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunglasses. The Sun wears Chuck Norris-glasses.

PGARP · 12-03-2009, 04:53 PM

Chuck Norris wears Ben Rothlisberger pajamas.

Tondtar · 01-11-2010, 08:55 PM

Chuck Norris doesn't cut his grass, he stares at the lawn and dares it to grow.

2M · 01-16-2010, 10:10 AM

yo Chuck Norris would be 70 years old in marchh thats crazy lol

Tondtar · 01-16-2010, 04:38 PM

.

Kyosho · 01-17-2010, 03:55 PM

Jesus can walk on water, but only Chuck Norris can swim on land.

shift330 · 01-26-2010, 05:53 PM

Mr. T beat Chuck Norris in a game of chess, in retaliation Chuck Norris invented racism.

Darkcyd_Turbo · 01-26-2010, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kyosho

Jesus can walk on water, but only Chuck Norris can swim on land.

Feyd · 01-03-2011, 07:24 PM

Who wears whom?

NYCGarbagePrince · 01-03-2011, 09:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alpine3

yo Chuck Norris would be 70 years old in marchh thats crazy lol

he is 70...

UncleWede · 04-29-2011, 01:02 PM

Does Chuck have a wallet made out of chupacabra leather??

CollinsE90 · 04-29-2011, 07:16 PM

Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.

Malek@MRF · 05-01-2011, 04:11 PM

Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter.

bhoch · 05-01-2011, 04:14 PM

When a zombie bites Chuck Norris he does not become a Zombie... the Zombie becomes another Chuck Norris.

11-06-2009, 09:36 AM	#67
Bimmer-Pilot NY Yankees #1 150 Rep 1,174 Posts Drives: 2010 AW E92 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Palm Beach Gardens,FL iTrader: (4) Garage List 2008 Ferrari F-430 [0.00] 06 X-3 [0.00]	[u2b]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dGJmDfSXps4&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dGJmDfSXps4&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/u2b] __________________
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11-07-2009, 01:45 AM	#68
Bulldog 6 The Logistician 73 Rep 799 Posts Drives: 2022 230i M-Sport Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Richmond, VA iTrader: (0) Garage List 2007 328i E90 [0.00]	Chuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity, Chuck Norris got it back.
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11-20-2009, 01:08 PM	#70
2AD Tanker Second Lieutenant 7 Rep 242 Posts Drives: 135i Black Sapphire Metallic Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Beer town USA (Milwaukee) iTrader: (0)	I have not laughed this hard in a while!!!!! __________________
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11-20-2009, 03:18 PM	#71
UltimateBMW Brigadier General 425 Rep 3,287 Posts Drives: MP4 Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: South iTrader: (0)	Chuck Norris vs. The Bear Jew Who'd win? __________________
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11-22-2009, 03:15 AM	#73
lostkhan Lieutenant 57 Rep 438 Posts Drives: 135i Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: newyork iTrader: (1)	Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody. Chuck Norris doesn't get pulled over. Chuck Norris is suing NBC for their show Law & Order claiming it is the trademarked names of his left and right legs. When girls have sex with god, they scream CHUCK NORRIS!! __________________ BMW 135i 2008 (Current) - Subaru Legacy (DD) - Mountaineer (Hauling) Maxima 95 (Retired) - Acura TL 02 (Retired) - Acura TLS 03 (Retired) - Acura TL 05 (Retired) - Scion tC 2006 (Retired) Audi A4 2003 (Retired) - Jeep Grand Cherokee 96 DD (Retired)
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11-30-2009, 04:22 PM	#75
SteveMD Colonel 201 Rep 2,485 Posts Drives: 2016 F10 535i MSport Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Raventown! iTrader: (3)	Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunglasses. The Sun wears Chuck Norris-glasses. __________________ 2006 E90 330i (retired) 2009 E90 335i (retired) 2012 E70 X5 50i M Sport (retired) 2016 F10 535i M Sport
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12-03-2009, 04:53 PM	#76
PGARP PGARP 0 Rep 2 Posts Drives: 2009 530i Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: WI iTrader: (0)	Chuck Norris wears Ben Rothlisberger pajamas.
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01-11-2010, 08:55 PM	#77
Tondtar 12 yr old Juvie 1137 Rep 881 Posts Drives: His Mom Crazy Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: El Lay iTrader: (2) Garage List 2008 (RIP in 2011) ... [0.00]	Chuck Norris doesn't cut his grass, he stares at the lawn and dares it to grow.
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01-16-2010, 10:10 AM	#78
2M Colonel 508 Rep 2,200 Posts Drives: Mineral Grey M2 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: New York iTrader: (2)	yo Chuck Norris would be 70 years old in marchh thats crazy lol __________________ E9X Picture Game: 8 points: (High visibility jacket; Strip Club; Pizzeria; Sobriety Test; E9x dressed for Halloween, Billiards, Oil Change, Orange Cone)
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01-16-2010, 04:38 PM	#79
Tondtar 12 yr old Juvie 1137 Rep 881 Posts Drives: His Mom Crazy Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: El Lay iTrader: (2) Garage List 2008 (RIP in 2011) ... [0.00]	.
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01-17-2010, 03:55 PM	#80
Kyosho Lieutenant 17 Rep 568 Posts Drives: 991.2 GT3 // Panamera Turbo Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Irvine CA iTrader: (4)	Jesus can walk on water, but only Chuck Norris can swim on land. __________________ Understeer is when you hit the wall with the front of the car and oversteer is when you hit the wall with the rear of the car. Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall, torque is how far you take the wall with you."
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01-26-2010, 05:53 PM	#81
shift330 Blue Force Tracker 129 Rep 1,372 Posts Drives: 2010 Hyundai Genesis Coupe Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Sierra Vista, AZ iTrader: (6) Garage List 2006 330i [0.00]	Mr. T beat Chuck Norris in a game of chess, in retaliation Chuck Norris invented racism. __________________ Stay safe 855th MP Company! Hosmer/Espinoza you're my boys!!
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01-03-2011, 07:24 PM	#83
Feyd Major 366 Rep 1,288 Posts Drives: a DEEZZULL Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Chicago, IL iTrader: (2)	Who wears whom?
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04-29-2011, 01:02 PM	#85
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18460 Rep 9,428 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	Does Chuck have a wallet made out of chupacabra leather??
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04-29-2011, 07:16 PM	#86
CollinsE90 Where my bitches 784 Rep 1,924 Posts Drives: Cadillac coupe deville Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: street corner checking profits iTrader: (0)	Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die. __________________
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05-01-2011, 04:11 PM	#87
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05-01-2011, 04:14 PM	#88
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