[a3ndy]

The doctor told a man that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the act.

The man decided, "What the heck, I'll try it." He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it.

He couldn't do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open.
He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe. Finally, he realized his solution.

On the way home from work, he pulled his truck over on the side of the highway.
He got out and crawled underneath as if examining the truck.

Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to masturbate.

He closed his eyes and thought of his lover. As he grew closer to orgasm, he felt a quick tug at his pant leg.
Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, he kept his eyes closed.

"What?" He heard, "This is the police. What in the hell are you doing?"

The man replied, "I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted.

The cop says, "Well, you better check your brakes too, because your truck rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago."

[vivekk]

Hahahahaha!

Nice one Andy!

BTW- do you fancy coming to UK2: The Second UK Meet- info below?

I think yours was the first UK TiAg I ever saw on the forum- great shots.

Viv

[a3ndy]

Thanks for the offer Vivekk, but I'm way too busy as I'm out of the country a lot with my job now.

[BMW F22]

LMAO- I was reading this in class and I started laughing (quietly) and the dude next to me thinks im crazy.

[thd13]

That's a funny one!!! Thanks for the laugh.

[bavarian19]

[jojogargoles]

thats funny!

[FABSAN]

i got one....

A young Southern boy goes off to college, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered away all of the money his parents gave him.

Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education are coming up with! Why, they actually have a program here at college that will teach our dog Ole Blue how to talk!"

"That's absolutely amazing," his father says. "How do I get him in that program?"
"Just send him down here with $1,000" the boy says. "I'll get him into the course." So, his father sends the dog and the $1,000.

About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.
"So how's Ole Blue doing, son," his father asks. "Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't believe this - they've had such good results with this program that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals how to READ!"

"READ," says his father, "No kidding! What do I have to do to get him in that program?"
Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class." His father sends the money.

The boy now has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out that the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog.

When he gets home at the end of the semester, his father is all excited. "Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk and read something!"

"Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole Blue was in the living room kicking back in the recliner, reading the morning paper, like he usually does.

Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messin' around with that little redhead who lives on Oak Street?'

The father says, "I hope you SHOT that son of a bitch before he talks to your Mother!" "I sure did, Dad!"
"That's my boy!"