[Mandi90TT]

Originally Posted by Salty Dog

So America watch your back because it seems that Canada is chasing after you folks for stupid lawsuits......

https://nationalpost.com/news/local-...c-f668d3cb870f

I'm more upset that he apparently got a large insurance payout for this:

Distraught at having gambled away his money, Tarwinder Shokar stepped out of Casino Brantford and threw himself in front of a truck, wanting to end it all.

The suicide attempt failed but he was left with serious injuries, for which he subsequently received a sizeable insurance payout.

[MKSixer]

.

[The Choosey begger]

!n

[The Choosey begger]

+k

[The Choosey begger]

+

[iminhell1]

^

Why did 60 Minutes rerun the 'medical' show about shrooms again?



boomers need more drugs?



we're all fucked.

[P1]

Originally Posted by anglo

+

I laughed so hard I physically cried at that. Hahaha!!!

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

.

This gave me the laugh I needed today. Thank you MK.

[bd307]

Originally Posted by anglo

,,

We have been noticing a lot of manufacturers cheap out on including batteries with their products, not sure about vibrators though

[bd307]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

This gave me the laugh I needed today. Thank you MK.

Maybe not seen from the pic, it is possible the Pope has a rope on his back pulling by another dude in case Pope gets too excited and jump ahead.

[Salty Dog]

;

[UncleWede]

^ OBVIOUSLY the one with more clothes AND sunglasses

[3798j]

Once Upon a Time.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Salty Dog

;

I don't need five seconds

[1MOREMOD]

He could do better

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

^ OBVIOUSLY the one with more clothes AND sunglasses

I would have gone with the woman on the left, because it probably cost him a million bucks to get her to pose for the picture.....

[Run Silent]

Submarine Simulation

Life Aboard A Submarine

If you have never served aboard a submarine or do not know anyone who is or was a submariner, then this list may help you understand what life aboard a submarine is all about (Well..sort of anyway.) Read at your own risk.

Spend as much time as you can indoors during the daytime, stay out of direct sunlight. Go to work only before sunrise and come home after sunset.

Paint everything around you Sea Foam Green (Navy NSN Green, no substitutions) or Off-White to be sure you are living in a clean, happy environment. Every Friday, set an alarm on loud for a short, but hated, drill sound. Then get up and manned only with a bucket, sponge and a greeny. Clean one area over and over, even if it is already spotless.

Eat food that you can only get out of a can and requires water in order to eat it. Empty out your refrigerator and turn the temperature control down, turning the refrigerator into a freezer. Get rid of all fresh fruits and vegetables.

Repeat back everything spoken to you. Repeat back everything spoken to you.

Sit in your car for six hours at a time with the motor running. Keep hands on the wheel. But don't leave your driveway. Log readings of your oil pressure, water temperature, speedometer and odometer every 15 minutes.

Put Lube Oil in your humidifier instead of water. Set it on high.

Buy a trash compactor; use it only once a week. Store the rest of the garbage in your bathroom.

Dont watch movies except in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

Have the paperboy give you a standard Navy haircut.

Take hourly readings on your water and your electric meters. But only for a six hour period.

Sleep with your dirty laundry.

Invite guests but don't prepare enough food for everyone. Serve food cold. Limit the time they sit at the table to 10 minutes.

Make your family a menu for the week without knowing what food is in the cabinets.

Set your alarm clock for various times at night; adjust the volume to the maximum. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get your clothes on as fast as you can, run outside and grab the garden hose. Then go back to bed and do it all again when the alarm goes off.

Once a month take apart every appliance completely and then put them back together.

Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.

Invite at least 120 people you really don't like and have them stay for a couple of months.

Have a fluorescent lamp installed under your coffee table and lie underneath it to read books.

When making cakes, prop up one side of the pan when cooking. Use extra icing to level it off.

Every so often, yell "EMERGENCY DEEP!" run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your wife for not having the kitchen area "Stowed for Sea!"

Put on the stereo headphones (don't plug them in), go to the stove and stand in front of it. Say (to no one in particular) "Stove manned and ready" stay there for 3 to 4 hours. Say (once again and to no one in particular) "Stove secured", then role up your headphone cord and put them away.

Pull out your refrigerator and clean behind it for 4 hours and then put it back when you are done. Have your wife come and check every 10 minutes with a flashlight to see how you are doing.

When doing your laundry fill it only 1/3 full, sit in front of your washing machine in your underwear and read a book or magazine youve read at least 5 times before in the last week. When the wash is done, only run the dryer for half the normal time.

Fix-up a shelf in your closet that will serve as your bunk for the next six months. Take the door off of the hinges and replace them with curtains. While asleep, have family members shine a flashlight in your eyes at random intervals and say either "Sign this!" or "Sorry, wrong rack!"

If you can do these, then you'll get a feel of my life when I was in the Navy.

[Salty Dog]

Originally Posted by 3798j

Once Upon a Time.

Can I get an Amen brothers!

[Salty Dog]

Originally Posted by Run Silent

Submarine Simulation

Life Aboard A Submarine

If you have never served aboard a submarine or do not know anyone who is or was a submariner, then this list may help you understand what life aboard a submarine is all about (Well..sort of anyway.) Read at your own risk.

Spend as much time as you can indoors during the daytime, stay out of direct sunlight. Go to work only before sunrise and come home after sunset.

Paint everything around you Sea Foam Green (Navy NSN Green, no substitutions) or Off-White to be sure you are living in a clean, happy environment. Every Friday, set an alarm on loud for a short, but hated, drill sound. Then get up and manned only with a bucket, sponge and a greeny. Clean one area over and over, even if it is already spotless.

Eat food that you can only get out of a can and requires water in order to eat it. Empty out your refrigerator and turn the temperature control down, turning the refrigerator into a freezer. Get rid of all fresh fruits and vegetables.

Repeat back everything spoken to you. Repeat back everything spoken to you.

Sit in your car for six hours at a time with the motor running. Keep hands on the wheel. But don't leave your driveway. Log readings of your oil pressure, water temperature, speedometer and odometer every 15 minutes.

Put Lube Oil in your humidifier instead of water. Set it on high.

Buy a trash compactor; use it only once a week. Store the rest of the garbage in your bathroom.

Dont watch movies except in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

Have the paperboy give you a standard Navy haircut.

Take hourly readings on your water and your electric meters. But only for a six hour period.

Sleep with your dirty laundry.

Invite guests but don't prepare enough food for everyone. Serve food cold. Limit the time they sit at the table to 10 minutes.

Make your family a menu for the week without knowing what food is in the cabinets.

Set your alarm clock for various times at night; adjust the volume to the maximum. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get your clothes on as fast as you can, run outside and grab the garden hose. Then go back to bed and do it all again when the alarm goes off.

Once a month take apart every appliance completely and then put them back together.

Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.

Invite at least 120 people you really don't like and have them stay for a couple of months.

Have a fluorescent lamp installed under your coffee table and lie underneath it to read books.

When making cakes, prop up one side of the pan when cooking. Use extra icing to level it off.

Every so often, yell "EMERGENCY DEEP!" run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your wife for not having the kitchen area "Stowed for Sea!"

Put on the stereo headphones (don't plug them in), go to the stove and stand in front of it. Say (to no one in particular) "Stove manned and ready" stay there for 3 to 4 hours. Say (once again and to no one in particular) "Stove secured", then role up your headphone cord and put them away.

Pull out your refrigerator and clean behind it for 4 hours and then put it back when you are done. Have your wife come and check every 10 minutes with a flashlight to see how you are doing.

When doing your laundry fill it only 1/3 full, sit in front of your washing machine in your underwear and read a book or magazine youve read at least 5 times before in the last week. When the wash is done, only run the dryer for half the normal time.

Fix-up a shelf in your closet that will serve as your bunk for the next six months. Take the door off of the hinges and replace them with curtains. While asleep, have family members shine a flashlight in your eyes at random intervals and say either "Sign this!" or "Sorry, wrong rack!"

If you can do these, then you'll get a feel of my life when I was in the Navy.

It takes a special kind of person to be a Submariner. I will leave that comment for interpretation. Thank you for your service and have a Happy and prosperous New Year.

[2000cs]

Originally Posted by Run Silent

Submarine Simulation

Life Aboard A Submarine

If you have never served aboard a submarine or do not know anyone who is or was a submariner, then this list may help you understand what life aboard a submarine is all about (Well..sort of anyway.) Read at your own risk.

Spend as much time as you can indoors during the daytime, stay out of direct sunlight. Go to work only before sunrise and come home after sunset.

Paint everything around you Sea Foam Green (Navy NSN Green, no substitutions) or Off-White to be sure you are living in a clean, happy environment. Every Friday, set an alarm on loud for a short, but hated, drill sound. Then get up and manned only with a bucket, sponge and a greeny. Clean one area over and over, even if it is already spotless.

Eat food that you can only get out of a can and requires water in order to eat it. Empty out your refrigerator and turn the temperature control down, turning the refrigerator into a freezer. Get rid of all fresh fruits and vegetables.

Repeat back everything spoken to you. Repeat back everything spoken to you.

Sit in your car for six hours at a time with the motor running. Keep hands on the wheel. But don't leave your driveway. Log readings of your oil pressure, water temperature, speedometer and odometer every 15 minutes.

Put Lube Oil in your humidifier instead of water. Set it on high.

Buy a trash compactor; use it only once a week. Store the rest of the garbage in your bathroom.

Dont watch movies except in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

Have the paperboy give you a standard Navy haircut.

Take hourly readings on your water and your electric meters. But only for a six hour period.

Sleep with your dirty laundry.

Invite guests but don't prepare enough food for everyone. Serve food cold. Limit the time they sit at the table to 10 minutes.

Make your family a menu for the week without knowing what food is in the cabinets.

Set your alarm clock for various times at night; adjust the volume to the maximum. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get your clothes on as fast as you can, run outside and grab the garden hose. Then go back to bed and do it all again when the alarm goes off.

Once a month take apart every appliance completely and then put them back together.

Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.

Invite at least 120 people you really don't like and have them stay for a couple of months.

Have a fluorescent lamp installed under your coffee table and lie underneath it to read books.

When making cakes, prop up one side of the pan when cooking. Use extra icing to level it off.

Every so often, yell "EMERGENCY DEEP!" run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your wife for not having the kitchen area "Stowed for Sea!"

Put on the stereo headphones (don't plug them in), go to the stove and stand in front of it. Say (to no one in particular) "Stove manned and ready" stay there for 3 to 4 hours. Say (once again and to no one in particular) "Stove secured", then role up your headphone cord and put them away.

Pull out your refrigerator and clean behind it for 4 hours and then put it back when you are done. Have your wife come and check every 10 minutes with a flashlight to see how you are doing.

When doing your laundry fill it only 1/3 full, sit in front of your washing machine in your underwear and read a book or magazine youve read at least 5 times before in the last week. When the wash is done, only run the dryer for half the normal time.

Fix-up a shelf in your closet that will serve as your bunk for the next six months. Take the door off of the hinges and replace them with curtains. While asleep, have family members shine a flashlight in your eyes at random intervals and say either "Sign this!" or "Sorry, wrong rack!"

If you can do these, then you'll get a feel of my life when I was in the Navy.

You left out: Do your duty and defend the people of this great nation, even at the risk of your life and its end at the bottom of the sea in this tin can.

Thank you for your service.

[MKSixer]

Best description ever!
Thanks for your service and Happy and Prosperous New Year!!

Originally Posted by Run Silent

Submarine Simulation

Life Aboard A Submarine

If you have never served aboard a submarine or do not know anyone who is or was a submariner, then this list may help you understand what life aboard a submarine is all about (Well..sort of anyway.) Read at your own risk.

Spend as much time as you can indoors during the daytime, stay out of direct sunlight. Go to work only before sunrise and come home after sunset.

Paint everything around you Sea Foam Green (Navy NSN Green, no substitutions) or Off-White to be sure you are living in a clean, happy environment. Every Friday, set an alarm on loud for a short, but hated, drill sound. Then get up and manned only with a bucket, sponge and a greeny. Clean one area over and over, even if it is already spotless.

Eat food that you can only get out of a can and requires water in order to eat it. Empty out your refrigerator and turn the temperature control down, turning the refrigerator into a freezer. Get rid of all fresh fruits and vegetables.

Repeat back everything spoken to you. Repeat back everything spoken to you.

Sit in your car for six hours at a time with the motor running. Keep hands on the wheel. But don't leave your driveway. Log readings of your oil pressure, water temperature, speedometer and odometer every 15 minutes.

Put Lube Oil in your humidifier instead of water. Set it on high.

Buy a trash compactor; use it only once a week. Store the rest of the garbage in your bathroom.

Dont watch movies except in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

Have the paperboy give you a standard Navy haircut.

Take hourly readings on your water and your electric meters. But only for a six hour period.

Sleep with your dirty laundry.

Invite guests but don't prepare enough food for everyone. Serve food cold. Limit the time they sit at the table to 10 minutes.

Make your family a menu for the week without knowing what food is in the cabinets.

Set your alarm clock for various times at night; adjust the volume to the maximum. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get your clothes on as fast as you can, run outside and grab the garden hose. Then go back to bed and do it all again when the alarm goes off.

Once a month take apart every appliance completely and then put them back together.

Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.

Invite at least 120 people you really don't like and have them stay for a couple of months.

Have a fluorescent lamp installed under your coffee table and lie underneath it to read books.

When making cakes, prop up one side of the pan when cooking. Use extra icing to level it off.

Every so often, yell "EMERGENCY DEEP!" run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your wife for not having the kitchen area "Stowed for Sea!"

Put on the stereo headphones (don't plug them in), go to the stove and stand in front of it. Say (to no one in particular) "Stove manned and ready" stay there for 3 to 4 hours. Say (once again and to no one in particular) "Stove secured", then role up your headphone cord and put them away.

Pull out your refrigerator and clean behind it for 4 hours and then put it back when you are done. Have your wife come and check every 10 minutes with a flashlight to see how you are doing.

When doing your laundry fill it only 1/3 full, sit in front of your washing machine in your underwear and read a book or magazine youve read at least 5 times before in the last week. When the wash is done, only run the dryer for half the normal time.

Fix-up a shelf in your closet that will serve as your bunk for the next six months. Take the door off of the hinges and replace them with curtains. While asleep, have family members shine a flashlight in your eyes at random intervals and say either "Sign this!" or "Sorry, wrong rack!"

If you can do these, then you'll get a feel of my life when I was in the Navy.

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Run Silent

Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.

WHAT, no salt?????