Ask a girl anything?

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Funniest part was that you actually thought Sara would cook for someone... hahahaha...

Oh God I laughed so hard at this it reactivated my fever. Oh my god.

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:31 AM

Also, I see that my post was appreciated by some of the ladies but they haven't answered. I will take that as proof that my assessments were correct concerning their respective anatomies and the circumstances surrounding their passing of gas.

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Funniest part was that you actually thought Sara would cook for someone... hahahaha...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Oh God I laughed so hard at this it reactivated my fever. Oh my god.

Shit I can't stop reading this. Cannot be unseen!

Lups · 03-09-2016, 11:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Well, Lups probably farts intentionally around the hubby to establish dominance within the environment, while he is forced to contend with his suffering intestine and leave the house to relieve himself, lest his farts mix with the superior farts of his wife.

Biorin might fart, but it will come along with a justification as to why the farting is necessary to retain a biological balance in society, and why it is also not necessary to allow others to hear her fart to obtain this balance.

Sara504 probably just deals with old farts who are charmed by her allure, and gets what is necessary out of them based on intention/credit score/misc.

Thanks, this gives me an opportunity to share yet an other humiliating story from my past.

This isn't a story for the weak so do note that before reading it.

My ex boyfriend and I were having an amazing long weekend in this cabin he owned. We left on Thursday and got settled, we spent the Friday in the sauna and swimming in the frozen lake and eating cheeses, a few glasses of red wine and enjoying the life away from the real life. (I was about 17-18 then).

Long walks with the dogs sunsets and sun rises... Great exercise facilities, if you get my drift.

Sadly one thing about winter even us natives tend to forget is that dehydration doesn't set in as strongly as it does in the heat. You don't feel as drained as you are, until the death sets in.

On Saturday morning I woke up feeling like shit. I can't still forget how much my tummy hurt and I honestly considered letting him take me to the hospital. Some reason set in finally, and I realized I had not had any water or milk in days. Hours of pain and suffering and trying to get hydrated and our amazing weekend is forever remembered as the one waiting for the fart.

Yes. I have farted once in my life. Sadly this is one of the stories my lovely friends loooove repeating so it won't be forgotten.

"anna can you give me honeymoon advice... I'd like to find a way to make it so memorable all my friends enjoy repeating the story 15 years later still"

1MOREMOD · 03-09-2016, 11:40 AM

How does rehydration = fart?

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lups

<Lups's story>

You know, I think you are one of the only people who's stories are as beautifully written as they are relatable. I feel as though I read through a spoof of the Notebook with some gas.

The first time I visited Jamaica (also first time leaving the country), my body did not adjust well to the new environment. I didn't take a shit for an entire week. Needless to say, I think I would have rather just died from never having gone than waiting a week to go.

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

How does rehydration = fart?

Hey you've got your own thread for questions, sir!

jtodd_fl · 03-09-2016, 11:45 AM

This is why we can't have nice things. We have a thread all about hearing women's point of view and we get what? Talk about shit. *sigh* Thanks OBAMA!

Lups · 03-09-2016, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

How does rehydration = fart?

Well, that was the cause of the pain, air in the bowl. I suggest you won't test this.

I've said this often but dating/ marrying me is like winning the romance lottery...

jtodd_fl · 03-09-2016, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lups

Well, that was the cause of the pain, air in the bowl. I suggest you won't test this.

I've said this often but dating/ marrying me is like winning the romance lottery...

Possibly
http://www.thedailybeast.com/article...ath-curse.html

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Possibly
http://www.thedailybeast.com/article...ath-curse.html

Dude I couldn't make it past the bacon and mayonnaise sandwiches omg my chest.

You seriously don't have to kill me, I won't come near your family.

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 11:56 AM

Quote:

And in the August 19, 1936, New York Times: "Henry Patnaude of Manchester won about $1,100 in a lottery last spring and gave up his job as a meat cutter. Today he was found a suicide by gas."

Sara · 03-09-2016, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Funniest part was that you actually thought Sara would cook for someone... hahahaha...

Apparently you missed the "Coming on Too Strong?" thread. I cooked several times for Shaun aka Guido. I make the best god damn bologna sandwiches

UglyBuzzard · 03-09-2016, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Apparently you missed the "Coming on Too Strong?" thread. I cooked several times for Shaun aka Guido.

Can you make gumbo and jambalaya?

Sara · 03-09-2016, 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UglyBuzzard

Can you make gumbo and jambalaya?

Yes.

Sara · 03-09-2016, 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Sara504 Lups bimmette Biorin

Do you ladies fart really loud when no one is around? Or, do you sometimes almost pass out from holding in a fart so you aren't heard by anyone?

Just let me rip. My favorite is to fart on my older sister. She hates it.

Verbiage · 03-09-2016, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Just let me rip. My favorite is to fart on my older sister. She hates it.

Well then!

Mr Tonka · 03-09-2016, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Just let me rip. My favorite is to fart on my older sister. She hates it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Well then!

"It's the fart game son, you'll play one day."

Many aren't old enough of have good enough taste to know where that came from.

So.......

UglyBuzzard · 03-09-2016, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Yes.

UglyBuzzard · 03-09-2016, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Just let me rip. My favorite is to fart on my older sister. She hates it.

Might I suggest Shreddies

1MOREMOD · 03-09-2016, 02:04 PM

Yams work wonders for me but I'm usually good for one a minute anyways.

jtodd_fl · 03-09-2016, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Apparently you missed the "Coming on Too Strong?" thread. I cooked several times for Shaun aka Guido. I make the best god damn bologna sandwiches

I did indeed miss it. Can't tell if that is the best or worst possible outcome. I do hope it was at least a FRIED Bologna Sandwich. NO self-respecting person south of the Mason-Dixon has forgone the sublime Fried Bologna Sandwich. Also, good to see about Jambalaya and Gumbo. I may make a special request for a non-shellfish version, should we ever meet. (Allergic - boo.) I stand corrected and duly castigated. Carry on.

03-09-2016, 11:31 AM	#6140
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3631 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	Also, I see that my post was appreciated by some of the ladies but they haven't answered. I will take that as proof that my assessments were correct concerning their respective anatomies and the circumstances surrounding their passing of gas. __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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03-09-2016, 11:40 AM	#6143
1MOREMOD - 11820 Rep 23,186 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	How does rehydration = fart?
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03-09-2016, 11:45 AM	#6146
jtodd_fl 2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary 6709 Rep 1,298 Posts Drives: People crazy Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Florida iTrader: (0) Garage List 2015 F82 M4 [9.00] 2016 F87 M2 [0.00] 2011 E92 M3 [0.00]	This is why we can't have nice things. We have a thread all about hearing women's point of view and we get what? Talk about shit. sigh Thanks OBAMA! __________________ This space for rent.
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03-09-2016, 02:04 PM	#6159
1MOREMOD - 11820 Rep 23,186 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	Yams work wonders for me but I'm usually good for one a minute anyways.
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