Ask a girl anything?

Mr Tonka · 03-09-2016, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ASBSECU E93

Hey Mr Tonka - True Story

I was playing basketball with my BIL and some of his college buddies one year over the Christmas Holiday. He was still in college and I had only been married a couple years...

My wife drove us to the gym in her brother's old and ragged Bronco. The interior was basically a shell - the dash or interior lights didn't work. I took with me a gallon of Sweat Tea to properly hydrate (

) for the evening of full court activity.

After a couple hours - the wife came to pick us up. On the 15 minute ride home, I'm sitting in the back seat, stretched out and straddling the seat.

Now remember - it's December and pitch black outside the Bronco. It is also pitch black inside the Bronco because it has been stripped inside. We are on a desolate, curvy Mtn road...My wife has never driven this vehicle...

I float the worst 'air biscuit' that has ever been passed...WORST EVER!!!

How do I know this was the WORST EVER you ask? My wife stopped the Bronco in the middle of the road and, in true tear gas fashion, they both had to climb out of the windows for fresh air

Now - you may say this was mean and cruel punishment; HOWEVER up to that point, her brother would come over and run us out of our own house. After that - I claimed the crown and to this day, "I AM THE KING"

I think 4 appreciates says enough.

ASBSECU E93 · 03-09-2016, 09:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr Tonka

I think 4 appreciates says enough.

Heavy is the head that wears the crown

ASBSECU E93 · 03-09-2016, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eluded

your wife must love that. are those roses i smell?

My first signature quote - I am truly honored

jtodd_fl · 03-10-2016, 05:50 AM

Topic of strength reminded me of this.

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 07:32 AM

Masterbating yourself is independence.
Masterbating others is slavery.

Axius · 03-10-2016, 07:37 AM

If masterbating others is slavery, you can call me Solomon Northup.

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 07:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Axius

If masterbating others is slavery, you can call me Solomon Northup.

Solomon Northup was an American abolitionist and the primary author of the memoir Twelve Years a Slave. A free-born African American from New York, he was the son of a freed slave and free woman of color. Wikipedia

you're a free woman of color?

Axius · 03-10-2016, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grimlock

Solomon Northup was an American abolitionist and the primary author of the memoir Twelve Years a Slave. A free-born African American from New York, he was the son of a freed slave and free woman of color. Wikipedia

you're a free woman of color?

Grimlock. English. Learn to read it.

He was the SON of a free woman of color, meaning his mother was a free African American, he was then later kidnapped and forced into slavery even though he was an educated African man at the time.

MKSixer · 03-10-2016, 07:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Axius

Grimlock. English. Learn to read it.

He was the SON of a free woman of color, meaning his mother was a free African American, he was then later kidnapped and forced into slavery even though he was an educated African man at the time.

You are expecting this from someone who introduces himself as, 'Me Grimlock'?
C'mon Ax.

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Axius

Grimlock. English. Learn to read it.

He was the SON of a free woman of color, meaning his mother was a free African American, he was then later kidnapped and forced into slavery even though he was an educated African man at the time.

oops.. how did i make that mistake..

this is how conversation with me normally goes

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 07:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

You are expecting this from someone who introduces himself as, 'Me Gridlock'?
C'mon Ax.

bad traffic today, sir?

MKSixer · 03-10-2016, 07:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grimlock

bad traffic today, sir?

A 'Damn You Autocorrect', moment.
BP needs to acknowledge the existence of the Transformers and add their names to the accepted spelling list.

Verbiage · 03-10-2016, 07:54 AM

Still with this massive fucking sinus headache.

MKSixer and Todd, whatever voodoo you guys did on me, I give up. I promise I won't go after your daughters. But in exchange for leaving them in peace, I get to enjoy my car.

*runs off*

MKSixer · 03-10-2016, 07:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Still with this massive fucking sinus headache.

MKSixer and Todd, whatever voodoo you guys did on me, I give up. I promise I won't go after your daughters. But in exchange for leaving them in peace, I get to enjoy my car.

*runs off*

We will confer later and render a decision. I suggest you keep running, however.

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

A 'Damn You Autocorrect', moment.
BP needs to acknowledge the existence of the Transformers and add their names to the accepted spelling list.

cool, don't forget my friends Snarl, Sludge, Slag, and Swoop

next time your wife asks why you're late for dinner, .. "WHO'S GRIMLOCK?!!"

MKSixer · 03-10-2016, 08:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grimlock

cool, don't forget my friends Snarl, Sludge, Slag, and Swoop

next time your wife asks why you're late for dinner, .. "WHO'S GRIMLOCK?!!"

Definitely.

jtodd_fl · 03-10-2016, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

We will confer later and render a decision. I suggest you keep running, however.

Verbiage Fortunately for you, we need not meet to confer, we shall grant your request processing space in our hive mind. Likely outcomes are either pardon or death - about 50/50 right now. Stay tuned.

grimlock · 03-10-2016, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

Definitely.

commonly used words..

One of the drawbacks of using bimmerpost too much on ur phone, you chop down a tree with an 'Axius', you're daughter did well on the 'verbiage' section of the SAT.. etc.

Verbiage · 03-10-2016, 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

We will confer later and render a decision. I suggest you keep running, however.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Verbiage Fortunately for you, we need not meet to confer, we shall grant your request processing space in our hive mind. Likely outcomes are either pardon or death - about 50/50 right now. Stay tuned.

Thine art graceful and merciful.

MKSixer · 03-10-2016, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grimlock

commonly used words..

One of the drawbacks of using bimmerpost too much on ur phone, you chop down a tree with an 'Axius', you're daughter did well on the 'verbiage' section of the SAT.. etc.

Axius · 03-10-2016, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Still with this massive fucking sinus headache.

MKSixer and Todd, whatever voodoo you guys did on me, I give up. I promise I won't go after your daughters. But in exchange for leaving them in peace, I get to enjoy my car.

*runs off*

If it makes you feel better, I feel great today. Sore throat is very very minimal.

Told you, just use my method. Cold gone in a day and a half. Boom.

Mr Tonka · 03-10-2016, 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

We will confer later and render a decision. I suggest you keep running, however.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Verbiage Fortunately for you, we need not meet to confer, we shall grant your request processing space in our hive mind. Likely outcomes are either pardon or death - about 50/50 right now. Stay tuned.

Question for you dads. (and girls with kids, just reverse the genders below)

I see you're not keen on these young whipper-snappers chasing your daughters around. But what would you guys think if shortly after your daughter moved out, graduated college and started their career they told you they were dating a guy in his mid 40's, (or whatever your current age is when your kids have just moved out) never married, no kids, stable career, all around cool guy? Someone you'd like to hang out with even.

I think we know where Sara stands on this one.

03-10-2016, 05:50 AM	#6186
jtodd_fl 2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary 6709 Rep 1,298 Posts Drives: People crazy Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Florida iTrader: (0) Garage List 2015 F82 M4 [9.00] 2016 F87 M2 [0.00] 2011 E92 M3 [0.00]	Topic of strength reminded me of this. __________________ This space for rent.
	Appreciate 0

03-10-2016, 07:32 AM	#6187
grimlock Colonel 723 Rep 2,003 Posts Drives: F10 N52B30@255PS Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Hong Kong iTrader: (0)	Masterbating yourself is independence. Masterbating others is slavery.
	Appreciate 0

03-10-2016, 07:37 AM	#6188
Axius Banned 4202 Rep 216 Posts Drives: 612 Scaglietti Join Date: Sep 2015 Location: Watch Me NayNay iTrader: (0)	If masterbating others is slavery, you can call me Solomon Northup.
	Appreciate 0

03-10-2016, 07:54 AM	#6195
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3631 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	Still with this massive fucking sinus headache. MKSixer and Todd, whatever voodoo you guys did on me, I give up. I promise I won't go after your daughters. But in exchange for leaving them in peace, I get to enjoy my car. runs off __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
	Appreciate 1