[Quick6EF]

I'd put my money on a nice case of the clap

[PsychoSlug]

[NYCGarbagePrince]

You gotta wait a couple weeks to take the test. Friend of mine fucked a hooker in DR and the condom broke real early and he was too drunk to realize.

You were passed out in the car at 2:30-3 am? tsk tsk...

I give the story a 7.5/10.

Did she make you jerk off on her face or did she at least do her job?

[bunnn]

Anyone else realize that this "ho" is a 7 after make up and him still partially drunk...

[ghosthi32]

LOL sam

[CollinsE90]

Originally Posted by bunnn

Anyone else realize that this "ho" is a 7 after make up and him still partially drunk...

he probably smashed the red honda model

[Freakazoid]

Originally Posted by bunnn

Anyone else realize that this "ho" is a 7 after make up and him still partially drunk...

i think everyone's already accepted the fact that samwoo has no standards

[Kensta335]

Finally, a story not about taking a huge dump!

[leejoobin]

AIDS

[OC Guy]

You might of been lucky, no need to stress over it until your tests come back. We have all done it before.
edit: glad u are back good story.

[XYR03]

Haha damn bro what a night...but u r fucked

[coh4777]

Originally Posted by zetaxi165

Dude, you are effing stupid.... but then again the best stories are when you do stupid shit and god knows I have my share.

About STD tests. Different viruses show up at different times. Aids takes about 8 weeks to show up. Herpes about 12... and so on.

I have had a test done - just to check on shit - and man having the swab go down you pee tube is the most weirdly uncomfortable and painful thing ever.

Every guy needs to do it once in their life just for the experience.

ENJOY

Weird, I've only done the piss test and I know it covered HIV as well as a bunch of other STDs. Was the swab test for something specific? Does not sound like a fun experience at all....

[NYCGarbagePrince]

Last time I got one it was a blood test. I was also forced to sign a separate form for the HIV test.

[coh4777]

Originally Posted by NYCGarbagePrince

Last time I got one it was a blood test. I was also forced to sign a separate form for the HIV test.

Hmmm now that I think of it maybe it was blood as well as piss. For sure no swabs were involved. Given how fuzzy my memory of it is, maybe it means I'm due for another check.

[NYCGarbagePrince]

Originally Posted by coh4777

Hmmm now that I think of it maybe it was blood as well as piss. For sure no swabs were involved. Given how fuzzy my memory of it is, maybe it means I'm due for another check.

If I am not mistaken the swab up the urethra is the old way to test for the clap... But I am only a garbage man, I am sure Jaykay will chime in and explain in depth what the facts are.

[.:bHd:.]

lmao aren't you the guy I gave my aerolip to?

But that is one fucked up story. Everyone pretty much said it already some viruses don't show up early so you gotta get tested again a few months from now. good luck

[samwoo2go]

Originally Posted by bunnn

Anyone else realize that this "ho" is a 7 after make up and him still partially drunk...

I dunno how you guys rank ur scales but mine goes from the ugliest in the world to the hottest in the world no extremes omitted. maybe u rank ur girls from ugliest to hottest for normal day to day girls or 10 being the best you have a chance with.

or maybe...you're think its cool to boost ur ego on the interwebz by telling every1 u bone nothing but 9s. but whatever the case, she aint bad, she aint good, shes just a normal 7 to me. but I after I sat with her for an hour, mermaid theory kicked in and i bumped her to 7.5 and im good to go.

And to every1 crying about DUI, hey learn some Engrish and read, I was blacked out, my friend was guna drive, not me you dumb bastards. so no I am not going to kill myself in the garage thank you.
And before you go rambling on about me having a DUI, I got 1 while sleeping in my car on the side of the road because I was in the driver seat and the keys are in my pocket (apparently you gotta sleep in the back with keys to the trunk)

It pisses me off how punctilious some old hags are, I mean geez, I have awesome stories that I went out of my way to share with you with no expectations of financial or prestige gain of any sort, it's the highest form of art if you ask me. Just have a laugh and get on with it, calm the fuck down, no1 kicked your dog.

matter of fact, let me give you my revised PG version.

Me and my mate went out to a club to have a rest from our exhausting talks about god and careers, because the parking attendant said it was a rather dashing place. I had a glass of pineapple juice with a hint of lime, because I am not suppose to drink, it was quite splendid. My mate had half a pint of lager, because he was uncomfortable with this promiscuous women staring at us and winking the whole time. I personally think it's because of the nice new jumper I had on that my mum purchased for me last week at JC Penny. We got up to leave after an hour because the loud music was hurting our ears, what's a "G6" anyways? We should be getting home soon anyways because it was already 9 and I want to catch the late night shows in my pajamas and snuggie!

When we got up to leave, this scantily dressed woman (the one that likes my jumper) approached me and asked me if I want to buy her a drink. I said "OK, bartender, another glass of pineapple juice for this nice young lady here." She didn't drink it, I think she might be allergic to pineapples. I should've asked first, how boorish of me. She then started to lick her lips while staring at me, so I offered her my chapstick to make up for my cheeky behavior prior. She said "ahh...no thanks." Then proceeded to ask me if I wanted to "fuck" while rubbing her hands all over my sensitive area. She was really pretty, so I said, "o thank you, but how about you give me your address so I can write you letters and sonnets and we can court and when we get married we can have each other for the first time...it would be truly marvelous." she gave me this look which I can only describe as admiration and then said "fucking f@g?". I said "no thanks, I don't smoke because it's bad for me." She left angrily, I feel like I said something wrong...

We get to the car and I reminded my mate he shouldn't drive because he had that half pint an hour and 13 minutes ago...o wait...wait...wait...make that 1 hour and 14 minutes ago! HA HA HA, we both snicker at my witty comment. We can't be too careful these days. He happily thanked me for my kind reminders and we promptly hailed a cab home, it was $350 because we live more than 70 miles away, but it was worth it for a piece of mind I always say. I paid for it, because the poor chap has to pay another $350 tomorrow to get back to his car.

I got back to my flat, switched into my pajamas and had a wonderful night of sleep. The next morning I woke up alone like I always have but I do feel extra refreshed, and it was quite a beautiful Sunday so I said "o what a great day to do something rather dashing!" So I decided to grab my beloved pooch and fucked it in the ass. O what a fantastic way to end a splendid weekend.

Cheers mate

[DougLikesBMW]

lol...if it's any consolation, I always enjoy your stories Samwoo.

[samwoo2go]

Originally Posted by .:bHd:.

lmao aren't you the guy I gave my aerolip to?

But that is one fucked up story. Everyone pretty much said it already some viruses don't show up early so you gotta get tested again a few months from now. good luck

with the matte black kidneys right? I think so

[Wakka]

samwoo you have the absolute best stories on this forum. Thank god you are back.

[NYCGarbagePrince]

Originally Posted by samwoo2go

So I decided to grab my beloved pooch and fucked it in the ass. O what a fantastic way to end a splendid weekend.

thank you very much

[Kroy]

LMAO welcome back samwoo. hope you're clean bro. epic story as always. reading through the story i could almost see the story unfolding in my head like a stick figure cartoon.