[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by Sara504

Could be better, cant complain.. Hey I got a text message last night. I need you guys' input on how to resepond

Related to Tinder? Want me to bump Tinder thread for you?


Unless you wanted to ask the girls something, since this is your thread.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Related to Tinder? Want me to bump Tinder thread for you?


Unless you wanted to ask the girls something, since this is your thread.

Unrelated to Tinder, this is an IRL text from a guy last night.

[US///M3]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Her name is Jessica Kylie...for science.

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by Sara504

Unrelated to Tinder, this is an IRL text from a guy last night.

Well, ask away. Everyone's threads are everyone's threads.

[silvergray545]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Her name is Jessica Kylie...for science.

I like science.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Well, ask away. Everyone's threads are everyone's threads.

How would you respond to this? At first I wasnt going to respond at all, fuck him. But now, maybe I want to.


Summary, was talking to a childhood friend who I used to love and date way back when 15 years ago. We always said we were going to marry each other. Fast forward half our lives to now. We were talking the past couples of months again and then OUT OF NOWHERE he just stopped talking to me. No phone call, no texts, nothing. So I stopped as well. I actually took the time and wrote him a short letter and mailed it to him (I like to be old school) that was on March 15. Now, as you recall March 17 was when I had my first date with Mr. Surgeon and fell head over heels for this guy and went on a couple more dates, and forgot all about childhood friend.

I honestly couldnt give two shits about childhood friend anymore now. He's not my type physically nor do we even have very much, if anything at all in common.


I get this text message last night.

"So it's been 3 weeks since we have spoken and I feel now I can give you an explanation as to why. I got got your letter in the mail and almost responded that day. This isn't easy for me to say and hasn't been easy these last few weeks as I have missed you. The reason for my absence is because I have realized you are not the girl for me. I didn't know how to tell you so I hid from you which was wrong. The truth is I have never nor will I ever be in to girls as vain as you are. The flashiness, the 10 selfies or more a day on social media, obsession with expensive things, pandering to people you don't even know while acting like you are famous on social media, all of those things are a turn off and actually have borderline disgusted me at times. I'm sure buried somewhere underneath all of the vanity there is that girl I once knew and loved but she isn't there now and who you are now isn't who I want to be with. I am sorry and I wish you the best. "

[Sara]

I really just want to say "Already fucking someone else. Thanks bye!" but is that too bitchy?

[Axius]

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Excellent... I need to do some research on my teams customers! You do mean Dunn & Bradstreet, right?

Uhhhhh..., yeah! That!

[jtodd_fl]

Originally Posted by Sara504

I really just want to say "Already fucking someone else. Thanks bye!" but is that too bitchy?

Don't give him the satisfaction. Why not just something like:
"OK, thanks. I will focus on the many guys that do appreciate me. Good luck finding what you are looking for."

Take the high road. He is looking for a reaction.

[silvergray545]

Originally Posted by Sara504

How would you respond to this? At first I wasnt going to respond at all, fuck him. But now, maybe I want to.


Summary, was talking to a childhood friend who I used to love and date way back when 15 years ago. We always said we were going to marry each other. Fast forward half our lives to now. We were talking the past couples of months again and then OUT OF NOWHERE he just stopped talking to me. No phone call, no texts, nothing. So I stopped as well. I actually took the time and wrote him a short letter and mailed it to him (I like to be old school) that was on March 15. Now, as you recall March 17 was when I had my first date with Mr. Surgeon and fell head over heels for this guy and went on a couple more dates, and forgot all about childhood friend.

I honestly couldnt give two shits about childhood friend anymore now. He's not my type physically nor do we even have very much, if anything at all in common.


I get this text message last night.

"So it's been 3 weeks since we have spoken and I feel now I can give you an explanation as to why. I got got your letter in the mail and almost responded that day. This isn't easy for me to say and hasn't been easy these last few weeks as I have missed you. The reason for my absence is because I have realized you are not the girl for me. I didn't know how to tell you so I hid from you which was wrong. The truth is I have never nor will I ever be in to girls as vain as you are. The flashiness, the 10 selfies or more a day on social media, obsession with expensive things, pandering to people you don't even know while acting like you are famous on social media, all of those things are a turn off and actually have borderline disgusted me at times. I'm sure buried somewhere underneath all of the vanity there is that girl I once knew and loved but she isn't there now and who you are now isn't who I want to be with. I am sorry and I wish you the best. "

I think you should just keep it short and sweet. Unfortunately, after a message like that, there is no saving a relationship/friendship. Tell him that you're sorry that your lifestyle and his don't line up. Wish him luck in finding someone and be done with it. Don't add fuel to the fire.

Originally Posted by Sara504

I really just want to say "Already fucking someone else. Thanks bye!" but is that too bitchy?

He already thinks you're vain. Probably not the best thing to say.

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Don't give him the satisfaction. Why not just something like:
"OK, thanks. I will focus on the many guys that do appreciate me. Good luck finding what you are looking for."

Take the high road. He is looking for a reaction.

I dunno. I think it's a combination of honesty, considering how close they were at one point in their lives, and coming to terms with the fact that they are two different people.

Originally Posted by Sara504

pre-story

"So it's been 3 weeks since we have spoken and I feel now I can give you an explanation as to why. I got got your letter in the mail and almost responded that day. This isn't easy for me to say and hasn't been easy these last few weeks as I have missed you. The reason for my absence is because I have realized you are not the girl for me. I didn't know how to tell you so I hid from you which was wrong. The truth is I have never nor will I ever be in to girls as vain as you are. The flashiness, the 10 selfies or more a day on social media, obsession with expensive things, pandering to people you don't even know while acting like you are famous on social media, all of those things are a turn off and actually have borderline disgusted me at times. I'm sure buried somewhere underneath all of the vanity there is that girl I once knew and loved but she isn't there now and who you are now isn't who I want to be with. I am sorry and I wish you the best. "

Okay. So in recent years when you and this guy were talking again, were any indicators given that he was not necessarily in agreement with your choice of conduct? I only ask because these are not things to pull out overnight, and aren't immediately noticeable.

To an extent, I agree with dad; you are obviously not attracted to him anyway, and comfort seemed to be the only thing holding you two together. People morph and are molded by their surroundings, especially as they become cognizant of things when they get older.

You should be with someone who can appreciate who you are based on...well, who you are. I would let him know that you respect his opinion, and that you also wish him the best. No need for the portion about finding other guys, no need for a tit for tat approach, here.

[Never Convicted]

Originally Posted by Sara504

I really just want to say "Already fucking someone else. Thanks bye!" but is that too bitchy?

At least he'll know it's really you.

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by Sara504

I really just want to say "Already fucking someone else. Thanks bye!" but is that too bitchy?

Wait, you said you hadn't dropped panties yet. Did you lie to the internet?!?!

[Sara]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

He already thinks you're vain. Probably not the best thing to say.

He's saying it like its a bad thing though and trying to put me down. I'm not arrogant, I'm confident. You all know that. Is it a freaking crime now to love yourself and think you're beautiful? Isnt that the message we try to tell all women? To love themselves and be proud of what they look like? What you see is what you get with me! I dont contour my face. I like how I look and if I want to post a selfie everyday, I goddamn will. Its my instagram! (Even if Im not Verbiages cup of tea )

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Wait, you said you hadn't dropped panties yet. Did you lie to the internet?!?!

I held out as long as I could.

[jtodd_fl]

Originally Posted by Sara504

He's saying it like its a bad thing though and trying to put me down. I'm not arrogant, I'm confident. You all know that. Is it a freaking crime now to love yourself and think you're beautiful? Isnt that the message we try to tell all women? To love themselves and be proud of what they look like? What you see is what you get with me! I dont contour my face. I like how I look and if I want to post a selfie everyday, I goddamn will. Its my instagram! (Even if Im not Verbiages cup of tea )

As much as I hate to say it, Verbiage is probably right. He is just coming to terms with it. He did make it sound negative, but that may just be the way he talks. I would still take the high road.
"Thanks for finally telling me. I guess you don't really understand me the way you used to or the way I thought you did. Good luck."

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by Sara504

He's saying it like its a bad thing though and trying to put me down. I'm not arrogant, I'm confident. You all know that. Is it a freaking crime now to love yourself and think you're beautiful? Isnt that the message we try to tell all women? To love themselves and be proud of what they look like? What you see is what you get with me! I dont contour my face. I like how I look and if I want to post a selfie everyday, I goddamn will. Its my instagram! (Even if Im not Verbiages cup of tea )

I personally took his tone both ways, a bit of condescension with bluntness mixed in; it seemed like it took a lot to put those sentiments together, and coming across a man who is willing to open himself up instead of just withdrawing entirely is better than the alternative, you know?

And yes, we know you are confident, beautiful, assertive, and witty. You are the gasoline for half of this forum's fire.

Also, I meant to write you a letter (because I'm old fashioned, you know) to tell you that I thought you were too good for me and deserved someone of adequate social status and career choice. But, I guess it was more difficult to hide from you than I thought.

Can you be my glass of Macallan 18?

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by Sara504

I held out as long as I could.

You know you wanted to.

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

As much as I hate to say it, Verbiage is probably right. He is just coming to terms with it. He did make it sound negative, but that may just be the way he talks. I would still take the high road.
"Thanks for finally telling me. I guess you don't really understand me the way you used to or the way I thought you did. Good luck."

Dad you STAY taking shots at me man!

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

I personally took his tone both ways, a bit of condescension with bluntness mixed in; it seemed like it took a lot to put those sentiments together, and coming across a man who is willing to open himself up instead of just withdrawing entirely is better than the alternative, you know?

And yes, we know you are confident, beautiful, assertive, and witty. You are the gasoline for half of this forum's fire.

Also, I meant to write you a letter (because I'm old fashioned, you know) to tell you that I thought you were too good for me and deserved someone of adequate social status and career choice. But, I guess it was more difficult to hide from you than I thought.

Can you be my glass of Macallan 18?

[silvergray545]

Originally Posted by Sara504

He's saying it like its a bad thing though and trying to put me down. I'm not arrogant, I'm confident. You all know that. Is it a freaking crime now to love yourself and think you're beautiful? Isnt that the message we try to tell all women? To love themselves and be proud of what they look like? What you see is what you get with me! I dont contour my face. I like how I look and if I want to post a selfie everyday, I goddamn will. Its my instagram! (Even if Im not Verbiages cup of tea )

Trust me, I'm on the same page as you. Some guys just really don't like it. I don't know why. Most of the girls I like do what you do. I think you're just going to need to make one short and sweet response and just move on. Are you going to be able to be friends with someone that thinks you're vain? Nope. Relationship? Forget it.

[silvergray545]

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Can you be my glass of Macallan 18?

If I buy a bottle of Macallan 18, will you and Sara504 come help me finish it one night?

[Verbiage]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

Trust me, I'm on the same page as you. Some guys just really don't like it. I don't know why. Most of the girls I like do what you do. I think you're just going to need to make one short and sweet response and just move on. Are you going to be able to be friends with someone that thinks you're vain? Nope. Relationship? Forget it.

Does this mean you'll still be my friend even if I post more pictures of myself than my cars on IG?

Originally Posted by silvergray545

If I buy a bottle of Macallan 18, will you and Sara504 come help me finish it one night?

I'll finish her, you can finish the bottle.