[nerdogray]

When you get past 40, good luck. Most don't set their filters that high, so you'll never get seen. Likely won't get seen anyway, due to the way both apps algorithms work, but yea.. unless you are young(er) and attractive, you are pretty much screwed. It is in their financial best interests to stack all of the best looking cards towards the top, so even above average will have limited results. Even paying for "boosts" is only going to do so much when so many others are also desperate enough to buy them. Both apps are absolutely exploitative of the psychology of loneliness. You are better off not using them past a certain age, because they will only make you feel worse.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by nerdogray

When you get past 40, good luck. Most don't set their filters that high, so you'll never get seen. Likely won't get seen anyway, due to the way both apps algorithms work, but yea.. unless you are young(er) and attractive, you are pretty much screwed. It is in their financial best interests to stack all of the best looking cards towards the top, so even above average will have limited results. Even paying for "boosts" is only going to do so much when so many others are also desperate enough to buy them. Both apps are absolutely exploitative of the psychology of loneliness. You are better off not using them past a certain age, because they will only make you feel worse.

Jesus, I must be a fucking smokeshow then at 42 & 6'0"/175, have I been selling myself short my whole life. Im not even rich, I live in a townhome and have an old ass 3 series wagon.

Ive only been on Bumble for literally a week and Ive had 21 convos, like 8 that have been involved, and 3rd date is tomorrow night and all of them have been beautiful, really cool chicks with jobs and their own places and no kids.

And if #3 is cool I'll probably delete the app (while sending a "good luck but I am going to try and take this seriously" message to the others) and try and focus my attention to figure out who I have the best chemistry with.

Maybe its Atlanta or something, unless you guys are all putting your age cut offs at 30 or something you should move here, seems like all the women did.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Jesus, I must be a fucking smokeshow then at 6'0"/175, have I been selling myself short my whole life. Im not even rich, I live in a townhome and have an old ass 3 series wagon.

Ive only been on Bumble for literally a week and Ive had 21 convos, like 8 that have been involved, and 3rd date is tomorrow night and all of them have been beautiful, really cool chicks with jobs and their own places and no kids.

And if #3 is cool I'll probably delete the app (while sending a "good luck but I am going to try and take this seriously" message to the others) and try and focus my attention to figure out who I have the best chemistry with.

Maybe its Atlanta or something, unless you guys are all putting your age cut offs at 30 or something you should move here, seems like all the women did.

Being 6’0” you’re already pushed to the front of all suitors on those apps. My guy is 5’11” so had I set my parameters to 6+ I would have never matched him. He told me a lot of women have 6’0” or taller requirements written in their profiles, so he wrote “must be under 130 lbs”

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by Sara

Being 6’0” you’re already pushed to the front of all suitors on those apps. My guy is 5’11” so had I set my perimeters to 6+ I would have never matched him. He told me a lot of women have 6’0” or taller requirements written in their profiles, so he wrote “must be under 130 lbs”

I put in "Real names and faces please, mine are..." at the end of mine after seeing all the facetune. I swipe left on facetune from the get, if I don't see pores I know you're lying. Im a GWAC who is good at photoshop, Im trained to see even the "good" ones (of which there isnt, all faceapp stuff looks like shit, just some more than others).

If you guys are 5'10 then just put 6 in for height and swipe right on the facetuned pics. Then you're both fibbing.

Make it 4 as of 5 minutes ago, Im def deleting the app after this last date. Hell even two of them make more than me, there has to be a winner in there.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

I put in "Real names and faces please, mine are..." at the end of mine after seeing all the facetune. I swipe left on facetune from the get, if I don't see pores I know you're lying. Im a GWAC who is good at photoshop, Im trained to see even the "good" ones (of which there isnt, all faceapp stuff looks like shit, just some more than others).

If you guys are 5'10 then just put 6 in for height and swipe right on the facetuned pics. Then you're both fibbing.

Make it 4 as of 5 minutes ago, Im def deleting the app after this last date. Hell even two of them make more than me, there has to be a winner in there.

Crossing my fingers for you!

[Chihuahua]

Originally Posted by Germanauto

Partly agree but I also feel when approaching women, nowadays we are already competing against at least a few guys they're talking to on apps or on IG.

If you're talking to someone in person and you're even halfway decent at conversation you more than likely have a HUGE leg up on anyone that's on her phone. I make this statement assuming there is some level of attraction on her part (and yours).

[dradernh]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Hell even two of them make more than me, there has to be a winner in there.

I don't use the apps, but can you specify a minimum income to keep those you won't consider from coming up? Assuming they're honest about it, that should speed things up considerably.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by dradernh

I don't use the apps, but can you specify a minimum income to keep those you won't consider from coming up? Assuming they're honest about it, that should speed things up considerably.

Not bumble, I think there is an "I'm rich" version of the apps but again who knows. I only did bumble and hinge and I quickly ditched hinge because it was all too heavily curated pics and no information.

So now 5, apparently weekends are when everyone gets on. Messages would trickle in during the week but now everyone is hitting me up.

Almost changed to hanging with a girl I've already been on a date tonight but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow so tonight is being a good boy so I can hit the gym in the AM.

And no I'm not a muscle freak either, just generally athletic. And my pictures are about 15lbs skinnier because I hadn't fully recovered from the wreck and couldn't lift for 6 months.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by Chihuahua

If you're talking to someone in person and you're even halfway decent at conversation you more than likely have a HUGE leg up on anyone that's on her phone. I make this statement assuming there is some level of attraction on her part (and yours).

The thing about the apps is you can basically clear two things:
1. Available
2. At least somewhat attracted

I won't chat for long before I say let's get coffee or a beer to prove we are who we are.

[2008M36MT]

I went on another date today, the girl I went out with said she’s been on hundreds of dates, showed me how many matches she got in 3 days, over 1k, then said something like I am not attracted to you but want to keep going out, and want to kiss. I was like well that’s kind of a blow to my ego so I don’t know if this’ll work. Now she’s texting me and wanting to have sex, explaining she’s on the spectrum, so looks don’t matter so on and so forth, that she just needs to connect emotionally to have sex. Jesus.H.Christ.

[ASAP]

oh boy... dont walk... sprint faster than usain bolt lol

[ryan stewart]

So my buddy told me I'd run into a bunch of those before I got a real date but for some reason haven't, I'm wondering if it's who I attract or if I'm filtering them.

[2008M36MT]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

So my buddy told me I'd run into a bunch of those before I got a real date but for some reason haven't, I'm wondering if it's who I attract or if I'm filtering them.

I dunno she seems honest, showed me her ex who was even worse than me, but why say that to someone? That kind of thing won’t be perceived by men or women, I can get in her pants by putting my ego aside but the sex won’t be as good for me at least. But sex is sex no? She also comes of as a stage 5 clinger.

[ryan stewart]

So I came out of a hypersexual relationship so that might be helping me a little bit, I'm in no rush. My last girlfriend was basically a horny Barbie doll but mad as a hatter. Im also a serial monogamist and haven't been single most of my adult life.

As a result I'm picky on more than just looks, have ZERO issue with rejection, and I've been very frank with the ones I'm talking to.

Personally I'd say a hard pass on that one, but depends on what you're looking for. You might be distracted with the bunny boiler when Mrs right walks by.

[Alfisti]

Originally Posted by 2008M36MT

I dunno she seems honest, showed me her ex who was even worse than me, but why say that to someone? That kind of thing won’t be perceived by men or women, I can get in her pants by putting my ego aside but the sex won’t be as good for me at least. But sex is sex no? She also comes of as a stage 5 clinger.

Does she know your real name and know where you live?

[Sara]

Originally Posted by 2008M36MT

I dunno she seems honest, showed me her ex who was even worse than me, but why say that to someone? That kind of thing won’t be perceived by men or women, I can get in her pants by putting my ego aside but the sex won’t be as good for me at least. But sex is sex no? She also comes of as a stage 5 clinger.

Please don’t. This screams HSV to me. Save yourself. There’s actually a Facebook group I’m apart of called “are we dating the same guy?” The amount of women who are knock outs and just drop dead gorgeous, girl next door looks, that openly admit they have HSV (and god knows what else) and are actively on hinge, bumble and conflicted about telling their dates before sex, scares me.

She seems desperate for sex, that’s a huge red flag.

[ASAP]

umm yikes... lol

[Sara]

Originally Posted by ASAP

umm yikes... lol

These are the kinds of posts they make. I’ve screenshot them and sent them to my best guy friend because he’s dumb and loves to bed a girl during the first week of dating. Tried to scare some sense into him. You just never know!!

[ASAP]

... sometimes i wish we went back to arranged marriages lol...

[Watching The World Burn]

Originally Posted by ASAP

... sometimes i wish we went back to arranged marriages lol...

Those the ones where the father of the groom tests the virginity of the bride?

[Chihuahua]

Originally Posted by 2008M36MT

But sex is sex no?

It can be initially, but do it enough and at some point someone is going to get attached. I would run as fast as you can from this one, she sounds like a seriously damaged individual.

[ryan stewart]

Welp, I'm out.

Had her over for dinner, long night, and she turned to me and says, "are you a fan of (my favorite modern composer), because I have tickets and would like to take you."

So she is basically my female equivalent or a CIA asset who is assigned to me, either way I'm in for a ride...