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      03-31-2014, 01:51 PM   #1
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First World Problems

I declare today as First World Problem Day. I know there are real problems in the world, like the missing Malay airliner, Putin's land grab, the Koreas lobbing shells at each other, and of course the tragic uncoupling of Bimbo and the Rock Star. But I want to dedicate this thread to the First World Problems we all have.

I'm over at the university food court today having lunch with Wifey. I go to grab some ketchup. The food court has these ketchup and mustard dispensers that look like soda fountain taps. You just push the small plastic tab and squirt some ketchup into a little paper cup. Well some jackass, maybe as an early April Fools joke, pumped up the pressure in the dispenser to about 90psi. I just barely touched the tab and watery ketchup came blasting out of the tap, knocking the cup from my hand and covering my midsection with nastiness. New shirt, khakis, and sport coat all blasted. Luckily I live nearby so I was able to go home and change and drop the stuff off at the dry cleaner on the way back.

I can only think that if some kid with a quick iPhone caught a video of me getting sprayed that it'll go viral in a heartbeat.
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      03-31-2014, 01:53 PM   #2
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I hate ketchup
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      03-31-2014, 01:55 PM   #3
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my fucking ipad will not play my iTunes music videos in a series like my iphone does...

POS just plays one video at a time - pisses me the fuck off...

#firstworldproblems
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      03-31-2014, 01:55 PM   #4
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Quote:
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I hate ketchup
I'm developing a serious aversion to it myself now.
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      03-31-2014, 01:56 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
my fucking ipad will not play my iTunes music videos in a series like my iphone does...

POS just plays one video at a time - pisses me the fuck off...

#firstworldproblems
Damn, I feel for you, dude. That blows hard.
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      03-31-2014, 01:59 PM   #6
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oh, here's another one - I have a bone to pick with Yoplait...

how about you redesign your fucking peel back top so that when you pull the top off, a tiny bit of yogurt doesn't squirt out due to the fucking pressure...

pisses me the fuck off......

#firstworldproblems
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      03-31-2014, 02:05 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
oh, here's another one - I have a bone to pick with Yoplait...

how about you redesign your fucking peel back top so that when you pull the top off, a tiny bit of yogurt doesn't squirt out due to the fucking pressure...

pisses me the fuck off......

#firstworldproblems
I HATE THAT!!!!!!!!!!
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      03-31-2014, 02:05 PM   #8
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I poured the wrong milk into my cereal bowl this morning
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      03-31-2014, 02:07 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
oh, here's another one - I have a bone to pick with Yoplait...

how about you redesign your fucking peel back top so that when you pull the top off, a tiny bit of yogurt doesn't squirt out due to the fucking pressure...

pisses me the fuck off......

#firstworldproblems
So both of us are having pressure-related food problems. Maybe this isn't trivial after all. Could require a new government agency to monitor food container pressure.
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      03-31-2014, 02:10 PM   #10
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Quote:
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I poured the wrong milk into my cereal bowl this morning
Not organic, eh? Hate that.
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      03-31-2014, 02:11 PM   #11
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Not organic, eh? Hate that.
I poured skim instead of 2% Hate that watery shit.
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      03-31-2014, 02:11 PM   #12
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I have a fridge full of food that I have no interest in eating....
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      03-31-2014, 02:43 PM   #13
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What really sucks is that while my gold-plated Lamborghini is in the shop, I have to drive the regular (back-up) Lamborghini. #need2goldplatedlambos

And, the diamond-encrusting guy was too busy so I ended up with only the gold-plated version in the first place.
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      03-31-2014, 02:59 PM   #14
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What really sucks is that while my gold-plated Lamborghini is in the shop, I have to drive the regular (back-up) Lamborghini. #need2goldplatedlambos

And, the diamond-encrusting guy was too busy so I ended up with only the gold-plated version in the first place.
Wrong thread. #OPECProblems
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      03-31-2014, 03:05 PM   #15
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Wrong thread. #OPECProblems
How much will it take to make this the right thread?
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      03-31-2014, 03:33 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
oh, here's another one - I have a bone to pick with Yoplait...

how about you redesign your fucking peel back top so that when you pull the top off, a tiny bit of yogurt doesn't squirt out due to the fucking pressure...

pisses me the fuck off......

#firstworldproblems

That's annoyed me for years too. I always aim the container away from me to avoid the dreaded yogurt spooge.
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      03-31-2014, 03:50 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JasonCSU View Post
That's annoyed me for years too. I always aim the container away from me to avoid the dreaded yogurt spooge.
I peel the part of the tab that's overhanging - then I slowly peel back the foil piece around the edge.

slooooooowly I pull the tab off.....

pluueeeerrrth <--- that's the sound of yogurt jizz on my fingers

every. fucking. time.
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      03-31-2014, 03:53 PM   #18
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My Red Sox feed at work is a few seconds behind live. Need better internet. Sux.
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      03-31-2014, 03:56 PM   #19
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my best score on Spider Solitaire is 93...

I can't ever get any better.....

been playing it here at work since Feb 18th and I've played 229 games so far....
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      03-31-2014, 04:07 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bear From Jax View Post
I have a fridge full of food that I have no interest in eating....
LMFAOSame here!!!
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      03-31-2014, 04:08 PM   #21
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My 55 inch LED TV just does not seem that big anymore
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      03-31-2014, 04:13 PM   #22
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My 55 inch LED TV just does not seem that big anymore
It isn't. Postage stamp. Go big or stay at home.
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